|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
Beach bum blueAnd I'm back.
Still angry. Still sad.
But hooked on a different rhythm.
Drowning in self pity and wishing for something different.
I won't ever tell you but I'm not happy.
I can't even smile. How...
I just want to relive it all. Never be adopted. Not be native.
Have ambition. Confidence. Motivation to be what you wanted.
It's incredibly difficult to forget and I'm sorry.
I Have ForgottenHow did we come to this?
Our adventures have become routine,
we no longer look for the enticing.
We sit at the table and eat our meals,
no jokes, or laughter.
We walk along the sidewalks,
not listening to each other as we tell out stories.
What has happened to our thirst for excitement?
To do things we normally wouldn't without each other?
We've become so accustomed to each other's company that now...
AccumulatingIf I could be a ray of light;
your ray of light,
I'd be everything I ever wanted.
I'd reflect across your window sill;
the old paint catching me in its curls
I could be your only hope in the dark hole you cry in.
To make you smile would be my only mission.
Except, I am yours.
I am your ray of light.
I'll always be there waiting for you to just look and laugh,
smile because you know that this is real.
All you need to do is say hello,
and I'll come running.
You are my soft snowfall,
my colored leaves,
my warm rain,
One New MesssageEvery cell in my body feels the pain.
Bruised thoughts, my tears are suffocating me in another bed that isn't mine.
My only wish is that I knew what was right,
to be the one to crumble in front of everybody.
Spontaneous actions are no longer exciting.
I'm more confused than ever before.
All I want is to be with you,
to sleep beneath those warm blankets.
Would you tell me if I was looking lonely?
Or if I was wrong in making my choices?
Don't forget I'll understand,
more than you'll ever know.
Take my hand and I'll pull you into the lake.
We can make sweet love to the water.
The waves crash violently against us,
sending us through the walls.
A Little Bit of Whipped CreamWe run through the grass
and stumble over our too-long jeans.
Grasshoppers move quickly out of our way,
and the little ants scurry back into their mountains.
We slowly roll to a stop and give ourselves a once over,
nothing broken or damaged, grass stains are memories.
I grab your hand and pull you to your feet,
Silently wishing we could stay like this forever.
I love our simple pleasures and the easy way we get along.
I love how no matter what, you accept me.
Breathe easy, and take a step back.
Look at how far we've come
and the memories we made.
Are you ready to leave it all behind?
Don't forget the late and early mornings,
filled with pancakes and birthday cake.
If you're ready to let go,
then do it.
But if you're not,
Just know that I'm right here to understand.
FrozenI don't know what it is about this boy,
but every time I think of him,
I close my eyes,
and wish for rain.
Can you stop talking?
I need to drown in this song,
just for a few minutes.
He keeps me spinning on this wheel of emotion,
my heart goes from hot to cold,
and all I really want is for somebody to hurt with me,
or to take away my hurt, just for a second.
Every time he says my name,
All I can think of is how much I need somebody.
In the night, I can think.
This is where
I find all the endings to my beginnings.
Work, Power, and EnergyI am so sick of you
thinking you know me.
Telling me things,
that somehow, I'm just like you.
I have a wall, and I won't ever cry,
no matter how many times you yell at me.
This, you say, was you.
We think the same,
we like the same things,
I'm as unbearably stubborn as you once were.
You think that now that you've been "enlightened",
that they've helped you open your eyes,
you can throw this shit at me.
Don't think for a second that I ever wanted to be like you.
Don't think that I ever will be anything like you.
I can only ever be the person I've created, which is me.
You know that, every time you tell me not to do something, I will do it.
Every time you say not to, I will.
Everything you say to me, I will take it as a challenge.
You say "You'll never change unless you let go."
I say "Watch me."
If Only I Were LonelyLet's get found by the water,
kissing our toes,
sending shivers through our legs.
The wind will gently blow the hair from my face,
will you lean in and put it back into place?
I'm only a memory,
except,I become more and more pressing as time rages on,
instead of being forgotten.
Skip a couple bridges,
snap to the beginning,
can we just keep tumbling?
You've lost the key to the door,
the door into my heart,
and it sucks that I never keep a spare.
If only I were lonely,
Maybe this could work.
If It's Love, I Wouldn't KnowIf I took a crack at being with you,
I'd be pretty broken up.
I just feel like cutting off all my skin
and putting some new stuff on and running into the ocean.
I've never shot for the moon or the stars,
but I've always wanted to be out of this world.
Everything sounds muffled, like I'm walking in a cotton ball world,
where every word is soft and quiet
and my mind is slow and foggy.
If I lie a moment longer,
I'll drown in my bed of tears.
I forgot what it felt like to feel,
to feel anything real.
He made me smile because it was polite.
I laughed because he smiled.
And I looked into his eyes because I wanted to know.
Where were we going, what were we doing, who are you?
Normally I wouldn't care but something didn't feel right.
I don't care about anything because then I didn't have to feel. If I don't feel, I don't hurt. If I don't love, I don't hurt.
But then...I could never feel love.
You can stretch and pull and break my heart,
but I have a feeling it's only going
A message to the brokenYou drown yourself
in liquid sorrows,
letting the salty mess
burn your wounds,
and the sadness
to drip in your mouth,
consuming your words
and you say
you deserve the pain,
but I want to dry your face,
and whisper in your ear
how the clouds cry too,
while they hold such beauty,
and so do you.
It's Okay to be ImperfectThe moon
Stand Against SuicideI know the pain is perhaps unbearable,
But darling, please put down the blade.
Release your emotions through tears and smiles,
Rather than dreading these days.
Do it for the little girl, whose mother can’t be there,
Or for the boy whose father drank too much.
For the boy who can’t sit in elementary school,
Because the bruises from Daddy hurt to touch.
For the teenage girl lying face down in her bed,
Thinking, why can’t it all be done?
For the elderly man looking up at the stars,
Counting the days one by one.
Do it for the children who wonder, does it end?
For the ones who feel left on their own.
For the ones who think, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
If I didn’t feel so left alone.
And finally, do it for one other person,
The person in front of these words.
Because you’ll never know how it gets better
When focusing on pain and hurt.
Live one more day, dear, for them and for you,
And I swear to you, problems will fade.
I know, for right now, it’s p
Clear WristA clear wrist, barren of scars,
as opposed to skin sauntered in marks,
tells a trickier story than it's soiled and raw,
uncaring, unkempt counter part.
Bravery, I think it holds,
the strength to bare unimaginable loads
of pain and suffering through endless times,
and withstanding the agony of sleepless nights.
Some think it is fear, the reluctance to cut,
but I believe it opposite, it show courage and guts.
To bear your pain without a nick on your wrist,
is like a solider braving his terrain while being torn limb from limb.
Agonizing as it is, to hide your pain,
you do it so well, and no attention you'll gain.
At the end of the day, it's not cry for attention,
rather a cry for the victory that's silently mentioned.
Your scars are those not self inflicted,
and despite the gnawing intention,
to harm yourself and ease your pain,
the scars you earn are rightfully gained.
In a room of those who have jumped the gun,
and left traces of blood deep in their arms,
do not be tempted to do the sam
dark circlesi haven't slept well in 14 days
my eyes droop pretty colors
'50 shades of purple and grey,
they're bags and they're designer'
making jokes is how i cope
with chapped lips and constant chap-stick
it tastes like honey and mint
i laugh and say i'm addicted.
hooded lids and sleepy smiles
during lunch at subway
my friends ask if I'm okay
I say that I'm just tired.
but really when I see him with her
my heart sinks to the tiles
she's pretty and witty and sure as hell she can sing
and i'm just a loud bone-collector.
when I see her with him,
dancing and laughing and grinning,
the ring on her finger
laughs at my singularity.
for as much as i lie and as much as i try
my loneliness still creeps in,
because no matter how much they protest,
i'm still the lowly fifth-wheel.
walking behind them on sidewalks
that are wide, but built for four
smiles and laughs when they look back
but the frown creeps evermore.
pelvis peaks through paper-thin skin
and knuckles white and pale
my ribs are empty, my bo
I Thought I Needed FeminismI thought I needed feminism, when I was a little girl.
And I am very sad to admit, that this wasn't very long ago.
I thought when he held the door open for me, that he was making a big mistake.
That he was being a pompous ass, and he took my strength for a fake.
And when he offered to pay my tab, I still called him an ass.
Because I thought he assumed I was poor, and below middle class.
Or when his hard work earned him a promotion,
yet I did nothing, and the boss' ignorance to promote me, I believed was a sexist notion.
My friend really wanted feminism when she found her ex-dead drunk,
removed his clothes, and without his consent, had a pleasurable fuck.
When her parents bust into the room unexpected that night,
she said he raped her, and he was arrested without so much as a fight.
Perhaps feminism was there when I walked out into the street in pure nudity,
and shouted the my neighbors “You have no right to judge me!”
I didn't care about the children who were standing in th
Atlantic DreamEvery muscle in my body contracts with pleasure when I think of you.
I want to dance.
I smile and giggle,
my eyes roll far into the back of my head in ecstasy.
I start to shake and I know that
It's you that I want.
Every time you smile, I can see the lines around your lips as if you don't do it often.
You look deep into my eyes,
and I can only look back for a moment before my shy side
makes me to look away.
My voice goes soft and quiet,
I don't know what to say without being myself.
I don't even know you.
Why am I still hooked on you?
Every time I think I have an idea,
Every time I talk to you,
you laugh and smile more.
You're soft with me,
not loud or obnoxious.
And each time I think I might have you,
You twist away hastily in an act of strength,
making me look weak.
Keep in Touch!